letting go, moving on...

timelines are a bitch.  not the kind of bitch one loves (like me!) but the kind one does not so much care for.  over the last weeks as we have come to a firm decision to take our act to ithaca i have been trying my best to time manage the whole situation. 

the questions swim around in my head; when will we list here, when will dana start work there, should we put an offer on the house we love there, when to tell people, when to go, when when when will it all come together?  mid july? end of july? august? when?  i run possible scenarios in my head all day these days trying to figure out what's going to work the best for our family. 

quite frankly money is our main obstacle right now.  or lack thereof.  as if juggling all of these details wasn't stressful enough we have plowed through our savings while dana has been laid off these last months.  i know it's not proper in MN to talk openly about money, but why the fuck not?  it's real. we all deal with it.  we all have or have had some struggle or questions with it at some point in our lives; and yet we act as if it's taboo to talk about it.  fuck that noise. especially in this era of economic uptheassofthemiddleclassedness, we need to be on each others sides. talking about it helps.

but i digress (shocking)... i met with our realtor today, got my homework, and decided on a list price.  what i'm realizing is that i have to let go of something i have historically NOT been good at letting go of.  i have to let go of a timeline.  i have to let go of knowing.  for those of you out there who know me, you know that i like to know. ya know?  it's not serving me or my family well for me to be obsessing about the other side of this journey.  what i am learning (and will probably need to be reminded of lots) is that each day some thing(s) get figured out.  we are building something from the ground up.  one bit by one bit and we (i) need to trust in the process.  i don't want to miss a highest-good opportunity for me and my brood because my sights were not focused on the tasks at hand.  so, just one thing at a time.  one detail. one picture packed.  one project started.  just one. 

breathe in, breathe out...

...plans are progressing.  some moments it feels like a smooth and swift current is leading us eastward and some it feels like we are wading through cement.  i made the calls to the family of origin.  save for my sister (love her) and her family there's not really anyone in the family arena to miss here.  we haven't been met with much (read:any) support for this move by them; the good news there is that they've never really supported any major life decisions so there is comfort in the familiar.

all that said, there are plenty of people we consider to be a part of our extended family network that we will miss terribly.  in that vein i just wanted to say that we will make an annual summer sojourn back to the MN areas that we have called home each summer.  it is important to us to see you all, and your warm wishes and sentiments of missing us are all deeply felt.  we are so thankful to have people out there who love our family and who really see us.  we love you all too.  just in case i (we) haven't told you enough.

ithaca: 10 sq. miles surrounded by reality...

i haven't blogged much in 2009 (duh).  but i need an outlet for my head so i'm gonna jump back on this pony.  thanks for reading (if you're still here).

we are moving.  didn't know this was coming a few months ago, but now that it has i know it's the right thing for me and my family.  we are not only moving, we are leaping in faith across the country to ithaca, ny.  it fits us like those illusive perfect jeans that make your legs look long and your butt look tight.  we are excited. we are terrified.  we are leaving soon.

as individuals the wivesband  and i have always been searchers.  as a couple we have been adventurous.  as a four family (as g. calls us) we have moved through the world instinctively and manifested a magical life.  there are surprises around every corner, and we have come to only expected the unknowing of living in this way.  we are aware as the grown-up leaders of the family that our choices seem odd, maybe even crazy or irresponsible to some. we're ok with that because the intent we cast out has served us well thus far.

when you tell someone you're moving lots of questions get thrown at you.  unfortch, there aren't a plethora of answers right now in our case.  we were in ithaca last week.  d. can be a wire monkey with the union there, and we have found a property we're interested in making our next home.  how all of that is going to happen i can't really say.  but it will.  and i'll keep everyone posted here as i know more.  and in case you were wondering, yes, we are very stressed out.  we are keeping the faith AND we're stressed out.

more to come.  check back regularly.

R.