yes we did...

there are so many things swirling around in our world on this historic day. speculations, praise, hope, caution, optimism, redemption, the list could go on forever. what i mostly feel, is hope. i am so grateful this morning, for hope.

as a lesbian mother who has taken on the joy and challenge of raising two beautiful little bi-racial girls i have felt a mother-connection to this race. what i mean by that is simply that i felt more invested for my kids, for what it would mean to them and their history, their journey, their story as young black women (and old black women) in this country than i did for my own political ideologies. in these last days and weeks as i watched obama campaign i held my breath and wished all good things for him the way a mother does when their child is on stage at a school concert. fingers crossed, almost afraid to watch, but too proud and hopeful not to.

good parents tell their kids, "you can be anything you want to be when you grow up". we give them this mantra to propel them forward in their lives even though, secretly, we know that it is more complicated than that. sometimes when i tell my girls this i wonder if i'm sort of lying to them. after all i have seen enough of this world to know that all doors have not historically opened to young people of color, let alone young people of color who come from trauma and are raised by lesbians.

but today, today i feel content. content that i have not lied to my kids. that we as a country have made good on my promise as a mother. my promise to them that if they do good and try their best they can achieve far beyond anything we can fathom.

the other night at dinner as we were talking about the election, and who my little darlings would vote for at school the following day my youngest, g., asked me where barack obama was from. it started us talking about his background. i felt pride and relief to be able to tell them about this (now) very mainstream man, and how he rose to his success from a place much like where they have begun. "he had one mom, and his dad was not there to raise him", i told them. "he had hard times in his life, but he loved learning and worked to be a good person and help other people as hard and as much as he could." they listened and asked questions and got very excited to vote, we all did.

after his win was announced last night i tried to wake them and tell them of the amazing news. my oldest wouldn't even stir from her deep sleep, and little g. didn't open her eyes when i told her, but she smiled a sweet little smile. this morning bounding out of their room the first question was, "mommy!!! did he win? did he win? " and i could say "YES HE DID!" the 3 of us danced in the hallway for a minute. two little black girls fresh off a night of sleep in suburban minnesota, still wearing their shower caps to protect their lovely locks, dancing in celebration of a victory they can only understand a fraction of. it was SO good.

they will grow up with the luxury of taking this historic election for granted. i can tell by the looks on their faces that they, of course, don't fully understand the gravity of this victory. someday they will understand though, and i wonder when that will be? i wonder how this will change the course of their lives? of all of our lives.

there is no doubt that there is a mountain of epic proportions to be climbed by the obama administration, and all of us who are involved and invested in our betterment and growth as a country. for today though i am smiling. because what i have told my kids, that if they work hard they can be anything they want to be, turns out to actually have more truth to it than i let myself dream before this day.

a stones throw...

i have some concerns about what i see happening with barack obama. more to the point, i have some concerns about what some left wingers are doing to barack obama. since just before hilary conceded there has been a trend of tearing him down, and it makes me want to step back and examine this trend of 'glorify then demonize' that we seem to be addicted to in this country. i am all about our freedom to ask questions and scrutinize our leaders and policies. but i would like to say to all of the loud mouthed fools out there that you should really be more educated before you start regurgitating the sound bite you heard and liked. because you sound dumb, and bitter. two qualities which make (smart)people immediately stop listening to you. which in effect removes you from the political discourse that you so desperately want to be a part of. ask yourself, are you moving the political process forward or in reverse?

it's alarming to me that i hear people, over the course of a year or so, go through the same course of talk about a celebrity like brittney spears, as i do about our democratic nominee for president. we build 'em up and we tear 'em down. and i wonder why? what are we getting out of it as individuals? because you know we wouldn't do it if we weren't getting something out of it. people love to cheer for the underdog, to feel they have somehow seen value in someone that no one else has found. but what happens when the world discovers this person and they become generally accepted? i see this all the time. someone loves the next big thing. the next big thing becomes THE big thing and then all of the sudden the original admirer does not love anymore. why? is it not cool? because a year ago the sun rose and set out of the arse of a plucky young african american senator who was considering a run at the whitest house on earth. it was his sincerity, and his vision for change that we all felt so hungry for. now we attack his sincerity and call it naivete and we say his vision for change translates to loose policy. with brittney she was a "role model" and a promising young talent (to some:), and now she's a filthy whore not worthy of our compassion. i have a news flash here people, she was never a role model, and she's not a filthy whore. barack was never the second coming, and he's a not a backwoods neophyte either. they, and the thousands of others like them in the public eye are human. aka, not perfect. ie, neither god nor devil. i am feeling really disgusted with this trend of hoisting someone onto our shoulders, cheering them onto the big pedestal, applauding them as they stand there and we adore from down below, all the while searching the ground for big freakin' rocks to hurl at them in unison and knock them the hell of that f-ing pedestal- i mean who do they think they are anyway!? c'mon people! knock it off. it's self destructive behavior. i hear the right wing and the terrified talking about the enemies coming to get us from other parts of the world and i think, why would they bother? we are going to collapse in on ourselves pretty quick here if we keep this up. we (USA) are like a spoiled teenager spinning out of control. someone is our B/F/F one week, we hate them the next. we consume everything we can get our grubby hands on expecting someone else to clean up our mess and pay the bill. we eat like it's the last supper 3 times a day. we talk loudly about things we really do not understand. we judge people who we perceive as different from us and we think our way is the only good way there is. it's really ridiculous when you look at it. when a voice of reason does try and creep in, we boo and hiss as loudly as we can and call them names. for instance, the media and many of the people who have jumped on the "iraq war is bad" bandwagon now like to say that no one was dissenting the war before it happened, that the president had the country behind him. false. i'm pretty sure i remember a latte being thrown from the window of a large SUV as my family and i marched against the war with a large group of other people before the war began. i'm also pretty sure i remember hearing about lots of other such rallies being help all over the country. but the booing and the hissing and the anti-patriotic name calling drowned us out. what i'm saying is that of more people would be able to articulate what they really think and feel if we would all just calm down. think it through. take turns talking. read more. ask questions, and LISTEN to what all sides have to say. and did i mention, calm down? what about think more? did i already say that? stop expecting others (read: public figures) to be far more perfect than you. they're not. they have an area of talent that is different than you, and they are qualified for a different job than you are. it's ok. you can respect them and disagree sometimes. you can like their vision and not agree with all of their platforms. you can vote for change and be brave and try something new even if you aren't sure if it's going to work out the way you want it to. you don't have to be obama-crazed to vote a democrat into office. he will do a good job. and he will make mistakes. these are the things we know. keep asking questions, but please calm down and do it nicely. you might be surprised with what you hear in the answers when you listen with an open mind.