it 'twas, it really 'twas...

'twas the night before solstice

and all through the house

not a lesbian was stirring

or even remodeling her house.

flannel stockings were hung

by the wood stove with care,

in hopes that ellen soon would be there.

the rescue dogs were nestled all snug in their beds,

while visions of homemade dog biscuits danced in their heads.

and kathy in her kerchief

and other kathi in her cap

had just settled down

for a long winters nap.

when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter

the kathies sprang from their bed

to see what was the matter.

away to the window they flew like a flash

tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

when what to their wondering eyes did appear?

some ladies in vests

drinking wine and dark beer.

suddenly from the crowd appeared 

an angel aglow

it was ellen degeneres 

wearing mukluks in the snow.

More rapid than eagles the lesbians came,

ellen whistled and shouted and called them by name;

"now kathy and kathi, and deb and colleen

on shirley, dianna, butch, and hakim"

to the top of the porch! to the top of the stair

come in from the cold, it's cozy in there.

The candles they lit

the wine they kept drinking

the food was potluck

gelled mullets atwinkling

they sang a few songs

jumped over the fire

they each knew they shared

a saphhic desire

Ellen stepped forth

and raised up her glass

"Happy Solstice to all!  I am drunk off my ass..."