there are so many things swirling around in our world on this historic day. speculations, praise, hope, caution, optimism, redemption, the list could go on forever. what
i mostly feel, is hope. i am so grateful this morning, for hope.
as a lesbian mother who has taken on the joy and challenge of raising two beautiful little bi-racial girls i have felt a mother-connection to this race. what i mean by that is simply that i felt more invested for my kids, for what it would mean to them and their history, their journey, their story as young black women (and old black women) in this country than i did for my own political ideologies. in these last days and weeks as i watched obama campaign i held my breath and wished all good things for him the way a mother does when their child is on stage at a school concert. fingers crossed, almost afraid to watch, but too proud and hopeful not to.
good parents tell their kids, "you can be anything you want to be when you grow up". we give them this mantra to propel them forward in their lives even though, secretly, we know that it is more complicated than that. sometimes when i tell my girls this i wonder if i'm sort of lying to them. after all i have seen enough of this world to know that all doors have not historically opened to young people of color, let alone young people of color who come from trauma and are raised by lesbians.
but today, today i feel content. content that i have not lied to my kids. that we as a country have made good on my promise as a mother. my promise to them that if they do good and try their best they can achieve far beyond anything we can fathom.
the other night at dinner as we were talking about the election, and who my little darlings would vote for at school the following day my youngest, g., asked me where barack obama was from. it started us talking about his background. i felt pride and relief to be able to tell them about this (now) very mainstream man, and how he rose to his success from a place much like where they have begun. "he had one mom, and his dad was not there to raise him", i told them. "he had hard times in his life, but he loved learning and worked to be a good person and help other people as hard and as much as he could." they listened and asked questions and got very excited to vote, we all did.
after his win was announced last night i tried to wake them and tell them of the amazing news. my oldest wouldn't even stir from her deep sleep, and little g. didn't open her eyes when i told her, but she smiled a sweet little smile. this morning bounding out of their room the first question was, "mommy!!! did he win? did he win? " and i could say "YES HE DID!" the 3 of us danced in the hallway for a minute. two little black girls fresh off a night of sleep in suburban minnesota, still wearing their shower caps to protect their lovely locks, dancing in celebration of a victory they can only understand a fraction of. it was SO good.
they will grow up with the luxury of taking this historic election for granted. i can tell by the looks on their faces that they, of course, don't fully understand the gravity of this victory. someday they will understand though, and i wonder when that will be? i wonder how this will change the course of their lives? of all of our lives.
there is no doubt that there is a mountain of epic proportions to be climbed by the obama administration, and all of us who are involved and invested in our betterment and growth as a country. for today though i am smiling. because what i have told my kids, that if they work hard they can be anything they want to be, turns out to actually have more truth to it than i let myself dream before this day.
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